Inevitable Milestones.

Time. (Sigh). Time is up to no good. Pretending to be ever constant and calm while it's just tick-ticking away. Beware, don't let it fool you. It speeds up and slows down at just the wrong...time. Diets, trials, and pregnancy - are all painfully slow. Children, birthdays, holidays, and school? They all seem to fly by way too fast.

Take babies for example. Such hard work to get here. The waiting, the planning, the labor. They get placed in your arms, and then you blink. Everything changes. With each baby you have, you gain a better understanding of how truly fast life keeps-a-movin'. And it won't wait for you. My first baby? I could not wait for the next new thing. The first smile. Baby food. Crawling. Walking. It was so much fun to experience it right along with her.

But this time? This time, it's different. I find myself holding on, desperately grasping every little thing I can. Maybe it's just me knowing, well not for sure, that Luke is our caboose. Honestly, I am fighting the whole way. I am kicking and screaming, and quite frankly getting a little teary-eyed every time he reaches a new milestone. It's not that I am unhappy. We are blessed. He is healthy and growing and learning. Each time I smell and kiss that Charlie Brown head of his, my heart warms. And aches. I am reminded that the baby smell won't last forever. I keep smelling it, hoping to permanently engrave it in my brain. Babies are beautiful.

It has been a big week of firsts for our sweet boy. The time has come to stop nursing. This has been, by far, the longest that I have nursed any of my kids. Reflux and his swallowing issues have played a big role in it. And even though it was hard and demanding, I came to love it. In some ways, I needed it just as much as he did.

Weaning? Well, that is another story. NOT fun. Luke refused to take a bottle. First, I tried my normal cold turkey approach. Apparently he was a little more attached (er, latched) to nursing than I thought. So, I slowed it down a bit, only trying the bottle for one feeding a day. I tried for two weeks...TWO very long, agonizing weeks. I tried everyday, for 1 1/2 hours - to get him to take a bottle, or at least a sippy-cup. He would not have it. He seemed to get little angrier with each attempt (hence the not fun part). So for that feeding time, I would have to resort to using a syringe and dropping the milk in his mouth. And the kicker was he didn't seem to mind the syringe. Temporary solution, I'll take whatever I can.

Sixty dollars, 9 different bottles, 4 different sippy-cups, and three syringes later - I found something that worked. I had to swaddle him, burrito baby style, with his right arm out. Lay him on a pillow, on my bed, where he could be propped up. I could lay by him, but not touch him. I had my phone set on games, plus five more baby toys that make noise, lined up to entertain and distract him, as he played with his free arm. Then I had to dip the top of the bottle nipple (Nuk orthodontic was the magic bottle for us) in corn syrup, and put the bottle in his mouth. He would take a few swallows, until the corn syrup taste wore off, then I would have to repeat. But he caught on. And when he finished that bottle - we both did a happy dance. It's silly - the things we do for babies. The happy dance was short-lived as reality hit - another milestone has been reached. The little twinge in my heart told me so.

Luke has also started crawling. Sort of. He has taken the longest out of all the kiddos to reach this stage (he outlasted Hannah by a month and Aleana and Trent by 3 1/2 months). He started out doing the funniest thing. I can't describe his crawling method, except he looked just like an inch-worm, inching across the floor, with his bum up in the air and everything. I am kicking myself because I didn't get it on video. And now I can't, because he has officially moved to the army crawl stage. I think he will stay here for awhile. That's what I am telling myself, so I can still remain in full denial mode. My baby is NOT growing up, and there is no reason to be sad because no new milestone has been reached. (My method of thinking is flawed I know.)

Then something wonderful happened in this week of firsts. Luke said his first real word. It wasn't the "just making noises and repeating them back" kind of word, but an actual word, with recognition. Any guesses? Was it following suit of his siblings by saying, "da-da"? Nope. Luke has broken from the pack. Yes sir, he has bucked the tradition of this household. And he has scored major points with me. That's right, he said "Mama". Maybe that's why we share birthdays.

1st Halloween - Chunky Monkey

Okay, so maybe I can't slow down how quick babies grow and change. I can't stop the inevitable. He's gonna crawl, and walk, and {shudder} grow up. I can't slow it down. Most of the time, I fight it - until I think long enough to realize how incredibly blessed I am. I get to experience all these milestones. I get to be a "Mama". I am grateful.